Fish Like a GIRL

The other day I had a free morning so I decided to sit down and take a look at my ideal 2025. I created a goal tracker, and I’m pretty excited to see how it works out for me for the year. I am not one to make “New Year’s Resolutions,” really. That feels flat and insincere to me. But I do like to have goals set up for the upcoming year. I find that breaking down those goals, either by month or by quarter, helps me get a better picture of what I think I should accomplish in what timeframe.

Having this in place also makes me take a hard look at what I am doing and, first of all, if it is the best use of my time. Second, it gives me a good look at things so I know when I am expecting too much from myself. I know I am not the only person who often fills their plate to the point of overflowing — and, let’s face it, there are only so many times you can just go get a bigger plate, before you are completely overwhelmed. That has happened to me a time or two in the past. It used to make me feel bad. It made me feel like I should be able to do more, but there was something inherently wrong with me. 

Why do I bring this up? I bring it up because I know there are plenty of people out there who beat themselves up (figuratively, of course) because they expect more from themselves than any other human being on the planet — and get angry or disappointed in themselves when they cannot complete the insurmountable number of tasks they have set for themselves. If there is someone reading this who fits that category: stop it. Be nicer to yourself. That would be a good enough goal for all of 2025, in my opinion. 

We all need downtime. We all need time to center and be grounded. That is not a weakness. We need these things in order to be the best versions of ourselves. That was something I was slow in learning, but at the age of 53 and three quarters (I have always believed that quarter-year expression of age was wasted on children), I can say that I have spent the last few years with the understanding that I need to also make myself a priority in my life’s plan.

As I sit here writing this, I am kicked back in my recliner, with one or the other kitten jumping up to snuggle a bit, then giving the seat to the other. Their whiskers tickle my face as each tries to get closer to me than the other. It is not quite daylight yet, but the custodian is already at the church across the street. This is one of the best times of day to live by the church, in my humble opinion. 

He lets himself into the church and turns on the lights to go about his day’s work. Soon all of the stained glass along the side of the church is illuminated, including the huge mural above the door, directly across the street from my picture window. From my vantage point, our flag unfurls gently in the early morning breeze over the grand silhouette of the church, the light from their parking lot illuminating it in the overnight hours.

 Even within the city limits, things are still calm, peaceful. My rich, steamy coffee warms my throat as I take in the hazelnut fragrance. I hear a train rumbling through town in the distance, off to places unknown.

As the sun starts to come up into the blue bird sky we will have today, the lights of the church seem to fade. Squirrels and rabbits wake and hop across the lawns and road, looking for breakfast. I start to hear cars passing by on the main street half a block away. Soon the day will be in full swing, and I am OK with that.

Sometimes that is all I need —  a few minutes in the morning to relax and use all five senses to immerse myself in the here and now, to be “present in the present,” as they say. It gives the day a whole new feel.

Some days, it take more than that. Yesterday, I spent over an hour at the gym. I realized I had been far too sedentary this week, and I needed to get up and get moving, like really moving. When I walked out of the gym, I had a whole new outlook on the day. It may not have been an exceptionally difficult workout where I pushed myself beyond my limits, but it got my blood pumping and oxygen flowing. I was happy knowing that I had accomplished more than the people who did not show up for themselves that day. And that was enough.

Sometimes it is a good book, a hot cup of tea and a thick blanket. Other times a glass of wine and a mind-numbing sitcom is just what a person needs. My point is, as we plan our incredibly busy lives where we seem to think we need to do more and more in order to be successful, sometimes there is a great deal of success in those quiet moments, if we let there be.

My 2025 is shaping up to be a busy and fun one, as I look at the goals I have planned for myself. Once I have it shaped up and know that I am challenging myself but not making things impossible, I will print out a copy and hang it on the wall in the office by my desk. It is an Excel spreadsheet, and as I accomplish things along the timeline, I color them in with a marker. Yes, I am one of those people who enjoy making lists solely for the satisfaction of crossing things off as I complete them. But it is also exciting to look ahead at projects and plans I have for the rest of next year, as this year winds down. 

In my planning, I always account for the holiday season. While I do not plan “nothing” for that time, planning ahead helps me to lighten the load over the last months of the year so I can enjoy time with friends and family, as well as having time for myself. While I may not have accomplished everything I set out to do this year, I am happy with the things I did accomplish. It also makes me more realistic for the following year, when I have a few boxes left unchecked in any given year. Looking ahead, I am excited about the projects I have laid out for myself. It will be a sometimes challenging, but always fun year, and I hope the same is true for readers. I would love to hear how others track progress toward their goals over the course of the year. 

Feel free to drop me a line.

Beckie Gaskill may be reached at [email protected].